Anal Toys for Beginners: How to Safely Choose, Use, and Clean
So, you're curious about anal play. That's great. We’ll cover the best anal toys for beginners. Everything from picking your very first toy to how to use anal toys safely, all in a way that’s straightforward and non-judgmental.
Let's get one thing out of the way first: you're in good company. Millions of people explore anal play and find it incredibly pleasurable. But if you're new, your curiosity is probably mixed with a healthy dose of apprehension. You might be wondering, "Am I doing this right?" "Is it safe?" "Where do I even start?"
This is completely normal. The key to good anal play isn't some big secret; it's all about patience, safety, and communication (with yourself and/or a partner).
Anal Training Toys: The Two Non-Negotiable Safety Rules
Before you even add a toy to your shopping cart, you must understand these two rules. They are not optional. They are the foundation for safe and pleasurable play.
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It MUST Have a Flared Base. This is the most important rule. Anything that goes into the anus must have a wide, flared, or T-bar base that is significantly wider than the insertable part.
The rectum is a one-way street that can create a surprising amount of suction. A flared base is the only thing preventing a toy from getting lost and requiring an embarrassing (and potentially dangerous) trip to the ER. No base, no buy. - Lube is Your Best Friend. This is the second most important rule. The anus does not self-lubricate. At all. Lube is a requirement for safe and comfortable play.
Pro Tip: Start with a good quality, water-based lubricant. It's the universal go-to and is safe for all toy materials (especially silicone) and cleans up easily.
Your First Time Anal Toy: A Buyer's Guide for Beginners
Walking into a store or browsing online can be overwhelming. Let's simplify it. The best anal toys for beginners all share three key qualities: they are made from body-safe materials, they are compact, and they are designed for comfort.
1. Material Matters
- Best Choice: 100% Body-Safe Silicone. This is the gold standard. It's non-porous (so it doesn't trap bacteria), easy to clean, durable, and feels soft and comfortable.
- Also Good: Smooth, non-porous glass or stainless steel is also body-safe and easy to sterilize, but they are rigid, which might not be as comfortable for a first-timer.
- Avoid: "Jelly," PVC, or any other soft, sticky, or porous material.
Our subscribers recommend: "Never buy PVC anal toys... You want a nonporous material that's designed to not bend, break, or get lost up your ass".
2. Size: Start From a Small Anal Toy
No, Really. This is not the time to be ambitious. Your first beginner anal toy should be slim. Think about the size of your own finger - that's a perfect starting point. The goal here is to let your body's muscles comfortably and slowly adjust to a new sensation.
3. Types of Beginner Anal Toys
- Butt Plugs: This is the classic starter toy for a reason. A good beginner plug has a very slim, tapered tip for easy insertion, a narrow "neck," and that all-important flared base. It's designed to be inserted and left in, allowing you to get used to the feeling of fullness. Many modern plugs also feature a Detachable Butt Plugs system, allowing you to start with a simple plug and add decorative elements later.
- Tail Butt Plugs: These are often butt plugs with decorative tails attached. Many beginners are also drawn to aesthetic or "pet play" toys. If this is your primary interest, options like a Bunny Tail Butt Plug can be a fun and manageable starting point. For more specific cosplay looks, you might also find Cat Tail Butt Plugs or realistic Animal Tail Butt Plugs. Whatever you choose, always check the plug's size and material first to ensure it's suitable for a beginner.
- Anal Training Toys / Kits: This is perhaps the best anal toys for beginners you can buy. These kits come with a set of 3-4 plugs that gradually increase in size. You start with the smallest one, and only when you feel 100% comfortable do you move to the next.
- Anal Beads: If you're more curious about the sensation of insertion and removal, small anal beads might be for you. They consist of several small balls connected by a flexible string, always ending in a pull-ring or handle (which acts as the flared base).
For Him, For Her, For Them: Is There a Difference?
Honestly? Not really. Most beginner anal toys are perfectly unisex. Pleasure is pleasure.
However, if you're shopping around, you'll see toys marketed specifically to men and women.
- Anal Toys for Him / Mens Anal Sex Toys: These are almost always prostate massagers. The best anal toys for men often have a gentle curve designed to put pressure on the prostate (P-spot), which can lead to powerful, full-body orgasms.
- Anal Toys for Women / Female Anal toys: These are often smaller, vibrating plugs. Many women find the internal vibration can stimulate the nerve-rich "back wall" of the vagina, adding a new dimension to clitoral stimulation.
The Bottom Line: Don't get hung up on the labels. A simple, non-vibrating silicone plug is a fantastic starting point for any and every body.
Your Step-by-Step Guide: How to Use Anal Toys Safely
You're clean, you've got your toy, and you've got your lube. Here’s the play-by-play for a safe, comfortable first time.
- Prep: Get clean. A quick shower or wash-up is all you need.
- Set the Mood & Relax: This is the most important part. Your anal muscles (sphincter) are designed to stay tight. If you're nervous, you'll clench, and it will be uncomfortable. Put on music, engage in foreplay, and take deep, slow breaths.
- Lube Up. Generously. Don't be shy. Apply a generous amount of water-based lube to the tip of the toy and to the entrance of your anus.
- Insertion: Go Slow. Position the tip of the toy at the entrance. Take a deep breath in, and as you exhale slowly, gently push. Your muscles naturally relax on an exhale. Never force it. If you feel any sharp pain, stop immediately.
- Listen to Your Body: Once the toy is past the sphincter, it will slide in easily. If you're using a plug, gently push until the flared base rests against your body. Now, just... stop. Breathe. Let your body adjust.
- Removal: When you're ready, remove it just as slowly. Apply a bit more lube around the base, relax, and gently pull.
"[You should] use plenty of lubrication. Keeping things lubricated can alleviate friction. Using anal lube can also make it less likely that your condom will break." - Joshua R. Gonzalez, MD (Urologist and Sexual Health Expert), via Good Housekeeping
The "After" Party: How to Clean Anal Toys
This is a critical step for your health. Always clean your toys immediately after every single use.
- Rinse: Run the toy under warm water.
- Wash: Use a dedicated sex toy cleaner (the best option) or a mild, antibacterial, unscented soap (if the toy is 100% silicone). (If your toy has a fur or faux-fur tail, be sure to detach it from the plug before washing, if possible. If not, wash only the plug and avoid getting the tail wet).
- Rinse Again: Rinse thoroughly to get all the soap off.
- Dry: Pat it dry with a clean, lint-free cloth, or let it air dry completely.
- Store: Store your clean, dry plug in a breathable fabric bag or a dedicated container.
A Note on "Next Level" Play (A Quick Word on Big Anal Toys)
You may see big anal toys online. Let's be clear: these are not for beginners. They are for advanced, highly experienced users who have spent months or even years gradually and safely stretching with anal training toys.
This isn't a race or a competition. Trying to go too big, too fast, is the quickest way to injure yourself.
Your Top Questions, Answered (FAQ for Beginners)
Q: Will it hurt?
A: It shouldn't hurt. Discomfort or pressure is normal at first, but sharp pain is a sign to stop immediately. To avoid pain, use plenty of lube, go very slowly, and relax.
Q: I feel like I have to poop when I insert a toy. Is this normal?
A: Yes, this is completely normal. The nerves in your rectum mistake the toy for stool and send a "time to go" signal. This feeling usually fades as your body gets used to the sensation.
Q: Will there be poop?
A: It's unlikely. The rectum is usually empty. To ease worry, use the bathroom 30-60 minutes beforehand and wash the area. Douching (enema) isn't necessary and can be unhealthy if done often.
Q: Will anal play make me incontinent or "loose"?
A: No, this is a myth. The anal sphincter is a strong, elastic muscle designed to stretch and return to its original state. Safe, gentle play will not cause long-term damage or incontinence.
Q: What if I see a little blood?
A: A tiny speck of blood usually means you need more lube or need to go slower, as it can signal a small tear. Stop for now. If you see a significant amount of bright red blood, stop and consult a doctor.
Q: Can I sleep with a butt plug in?
A: No, this is unsafe. Plugs are not designed for long-term, unsupervised wear. Wear them for shorter periods while you are awake, starting with 15-30 minutes.
Final Thoughts: Your Body, Your Pace
Exploring your body should be fun, safe, and empowering. The world of anal play is open to you, and the only "right" way to do it is the way that feels good and comfortable for you.
Remember the big three:
- Flared Base (for safety)
- Lube (for comfort)
- Start Small (for patience)
Listen to your body, don't rush, and enjoy the discovery.
